In my experience, anger comes up when we are feeling an emotion we do not like. So in other words, we feel anger because we are feeling something else
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Ultimately the most important part of fighting fair is understanding your part in the fight. This is probably the biggest step not only in fighting fair but also in reducing the number of fights that you and your partner have.
So many times I have met with people who are not sure why they are now overcome with emotions over something that happened in the past. Or they do not know why they are crying or feeling emotional.