Last week was one of those weeks. It was a week when nothing felt easy. I was feeling twangy and jangly and out of tune. I felt cranky and a little pissed off with the world.
For a very long time I was terrified of failure. The motivating force in my life was striving for perfection. I was always working towards being the best daughter, student, employee, partner, etc. But the problem with being focused on perfection is that it means you don’t take risks. When you are focused on success, you try to limit the opportunities for failure.
When I work with people who don’t report feelings of anger, I usually ask about other emotions as well. They often report that they don’t feel angry, hurt, sad, embarrassed, etc. very often. They talk about wanting to avoid those “negative” emotions.
In my experience, anger comes up when we are feeling an emotion we do not like. So in other words, we feel anger because we are feeling something else
So many times we are in a relationship with someone we truly love and we don’t understand why it’s not working.